Parenting is a crazy job. It requires unending giving of our hearts and minds. It is easy to fall into the trap of exasperation, exhaustion, and boring routine.
There are appointments, after-school activities, doctors, laundry, cleaning, driving, listening, intervening, disciplining—the list is endless. When our days become completely caught up in drudgery, and when we feel that parenting has completely drained us, it is time to examine what needs to be different and what should remain the same.
We absolutely do not have to take our kids to a million activities. We do not have to become chauffeurs and completely lose ourselves in our day-to-day lives. It is possible to take the kids to fewer activities and, instead of another practice or another screen, have a family game night at home.
Instead of letting time drain away in front of the TV, you can paint together or put on music and dance together. There are so many other ways to have fun. Our children enjoy spending time with us, even teenagers.
We do not have to do what everyone else is doing. If you look around, you can see that many people are stressed and tired. That does not have to be you. What are you actively doing to enjoy your time with your family?
Evaluate what parts of your life have become tedious, stressful, or dreadful. Notice what you still look forward to. Do not live on autopilot.
If you look back on your own childhood, think about how much happier you might have been if your own parents had fun with you and greatly enjoyed their own parenting. Think about how you would have been different if your mother or father had invested in themselves and in the enjoyment of their own lives.
It is easy to feel joy while thinking abstractly about our children. Enjoying being a parent, however, requires much more active effort. We become much better parents when we have authority over our day-to-day lives. We do not have to continue running around like a chicken with no head and turning our backs on our own needs.
As parents, we can enjoy our children. I so often see a subconscious feeling of resentment in parents. It is normal, and it can be changed. We can make conscious and active decisions that make us more fulfilled in our lives.
We dedicate years of our lives to raise children into mentally and physically healthy adults. Why not continue to do so while enjoying daily life? Our children’s happiness, both in childhood and later in adulthood, is directly linked to what they see within us.
They may not always follow what we tell them, but they are the ultimate imitators, and much of their character will be derived from our own. Teach them that life is enjoyable through example. Make your life enjoyable.
